What to do when haters are hating (on you)

My website has been hacked several times in the last few months. (Don’t worry, reading this won’t get you hacked as well.) Getting my website hacked is incredibly annoying, but otherwise relatively benign. My website tells people about my book and allows people to read my blogs, I’m not hiding government secrets or a list of foreign operatives.

The fist time it got hacked the hacker dropped links for advertisements into my posts. Like I said, annoying, but not life changing. (Maybe the hacker was trying to hint that I should be monetizing the blog?) The next time it got hacked the hacker simply took my site offline and it took some time to get it back up and running. (I’m sure people missed my blogs dearly, but for some reason no one called the FBI to report the travesty.) The third time the hacker set it up so when someone tried to go to my website it redirected to a Catholic website. (I got got by the Catholics!) Again, no big deal, a few extra people got the opportunity to learn about St. Peter’s church.

In fact I wasn’t sure why someone would bother taking the time to hack my site. It turns out that it’s mostly hackers hard at work practicing their craft. (Amazing job, guys. A+). Getting the website back up each time was a bit of a headache, but when I complained to my IT guy he said it could actually be seen as a good thing (say what?).

My IT guy said it was good that the blog was doing well enough to get picked up on search engines and found by hackers to hack. He said it could be seen positively because hackers wouldn’t bother with a site that wasn’t getting any traffic. That seemed a lot like trying to dress up a pig to me. (Is that how you use that saying?)

But he had a point.

It occurred to me that my website getting hacked, like most of life, is a matter of perspective. (As they say, “haters gonna hate.”) And in a way, at least I was important enough for people to hate.

I have one more example for you. Because of the industry I’m in it is important for me to maintain a social media presence. As a naturally private person this is difficult for me. I have always felt social media to be a little too self-promotional for my taste. And it has always been a lot of work for me to sustain. But the work is important for work I do so I do it (huh?). Recently I’ve tried to increase my social media output to keep up with the times. This has led to some negativity being sent my way. For whatever reason I’ve gotten some people who prefer to try to tear down than to build up. And in the same weird way, that’s a good thing. Or maybe I’m still dressing up the pig. (Is that even how the saying goes?)

I’ve been fortunate enough to write a few articles that have gotten national distribution and that has meant a little extra criticism. I’ve found that the more you try to be different, the more it rubs some people the wrong way. And that’s ok. In fact, that’s a good thing (at least that’s what my IT guy said, and he’s really smart.)

The point is this: there will always be people who would rather destroy than build. There will always be people who naturally knock down rather than lift up. To help you get through the hate there are four quick things you should remember:

Don’t be a knocker-downer. Be a picker-upper.
When people are criticizing you, the first thing you should do is check to see if you are being a jerk. If you are being a jerk, stop being a jerk.
When you are a person who exhibits the traits the world doesn’t understand (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) you will be a target for criticism. (Read as: haters are gonna hate.) Count on it.
Life is about perspective. Next time someone says something mean to you, look for what they are really saying. Einstein famously noted that in the middle of difficulty lies opportunity, but he could have also noted that in the middle of criticism there often lies a compliment.